Glossary
Custody & co-parenting terms, in plain language
The vocabulary you’ll meet in parenting plans, mediation, and family court, defined without the legalese. Terms and their exact meanings vary by jurisdiction; treat these as orientation, not legal definitions.
- Admissibility
- Whether a court will accept a piece of evidence, like a journal, message, or photo, and consider it in a case. Rules vary by jurisdiction and often turn on relevance, authenticity, and how the record was kept.
- Affidavit / Declaration
- A written statement of facts that you sign as true, often under penalty of perjury, used to put your account before a court. A good contemporaneous record makes drafting an accurate one far easier.
- Amendment (to a record)
- A correction or addition to an entry that preserves the original instead of overwriting it. Amendment history is what lets a record prove it wasn’t quietly rewritten after the fact.
- Best interests of the child
- The standard family courts use for custody decisions. Factors differ by jurisdiction but commonly include each parent’s involvement, stability, cooperation, and the child’s needs and safety.
- Child support
- Court-ordered payments from one parent to the other for a child’s living costs. Usually calculated by formula, and separate from the shared expenses parents split between themselves.
- Contemporaneous record
- A record made at or near the time of the event it describes. Contemporaneous entries are generally treated as more reliable than accounts reconstructed weeks or months later.
- Contempt (of court)
- Violating a court order, such as repeatedly withholding court-ordered parenting time. Proving a pattern usually requires dated documentation of each violation.
- Co-parenting
- Raising a child cooperatively across two households after separation or divorce, with shared decisions and communication. Compare parallel parenting.
- Custodial / Noncustodial parent
- Older shorthand for the parent a child primarily lives with (custodial) and the other parent (noncustodial). Many jurisdictions now use terms like primary residence or parenting time instead.
- Custody evaluation
- An assessment by a court-appointed professional who interviews parents and children and reviews records, then recommends a custody arrangement. Organized documentation is often requested.
- Custody exchange / Handoff
- The scheduled transfer of a child between parents. A frequent friction point, and one of the most useful things to document consistently: time, place, and how it went.
- Custody journal / Custody log
- A dated, factual record of custody-related events: exchanges, missed visits, medical and school matters, incidents, and expenses. Its value rests on consistency, factual tone, and an unaltered history.
- Discovery
- The formal stage of litigation where each side must share relevant information and documents with the other. Anything you’ve written, including journals and messages, may be requested.
- Ex parte
- A request one side makes to the court without the other side present, typically reserved for emergencies. Courts expect strong, specific, documented facts before granting one.
- Guardian ad litem (GAL)
- A person the court appoints to represent a child’s interests in a case, who may interview parents and review records before reporting to the judge.
- Hearsay
- Loosely, a secondhand statement offered to prove what it asserts. Evidence rules around it are technical and full of exceptions, which is one reason what your record can be used for is a question for your attorney.
- Joint custody
- An arrangement where parents share custody: jointly making major decisions (joint legal custody), sharing substantial time with the child (joint physical custody), or both.
- Legal custody
- The authority to make major decisions for a child: education, healthcare, religion. Can be sole or joint, and is separate from where the child lives.
- Mediation
- A structured negotiation guided by a neutral mediator, aimed at reaching agreement without trial. Many courts require it before a hearing. A clear factual record helps keep mediation grounded.
- Modification
- A court-approved change to an existing custody or support order, usually requiring a substantial change in circumstances, demonstrated with evidence spanning months rather than days.
- Parallel parenting
- A low-contact arrangement for high-conflict situations: each parent manages their own household independently, with communication kept minimal, structured, and in writing.
- Parenting plan
- The document setting out the custody schedule, holidays, exchanges, decision-making, and often how expenses are shared. The baseline your documentation gets compared against.
- Parenting time / Visitation
- The schedule of time a child spends with each parent under the order or plan. Deviations from it, late, missed, denied, are the most commonly documented custody events.
- Physical custody
- Where the child lives and who provides day-to-day care. Like legal custody, it can be sole or joint, and it drives the parenting-time schedule.
- Protective order / No-contact order
- A court order restricting contact to protect a person from harm or harassment. If one exists in your situation, follow it exactly and route questions through your attorney.
- Reimbursement
- Repayment of the other parent’s share of a shared expense you covered. Dated requests, receipts, and a running ledger turn reimbursement from a recurring argument into arithmetic.
- Right of first refusal
- A parenting-plan clause requiring a parent who needs childcare during their time to offer that time to the other parent before using a sitter. Disputes over it are worth documenting precisely.
- Shared expenses
- Child-related costs parents split between households, such as uncovered medical bills, school fees, childcare, and activities, usually in proportions set by the order or agreement.
- Sole custody
- An arrangement where one parent holds custody alone, in the legal sense, the physical sense, or both, while the other parent may still have parenting time.
- Supervised visitation
- Parenting time that must occur in the presence of an approved third party or agency, ordered when a court has safety concerns.
- Tamper-evident record
- A record designed so changes leave a visible trace: originals preserved, amendments timestamped, deletions marked. It answers the credibility question every custody record eventually faces.
- Timestamp
- The recorded date and time attached to an entry or file. Automatic timestamps, applied when an entry is created, are stronger than dates typed by hand.
Ready to put the vocabulary to work? Start with how to document custody violations or browse all guides.
This glossary is general information, not legal advice. For how any of these concepts apply in your jurisdiction and case, consult a qualified family-law professional.