Keeping a co-parenting record in Singapore

Separated parents in Singapore can keep their own dated record of care, access visits and child expenses, in a notebook or an app; we found no official form for one. The Singapore Courts use four terms: custody (who makes the major decisions), care and control (who looks after the child each day), access (how often the other parent sees the child) and maintenance (financial support).

The terms to know

Custody

Who makes the major decisions for a child. The Family Orders Guide has wording for joint custody and sole custody. A Singapore judge said in a 2023 speech that both parents should have custody in supporting joint parenting, and that sole custody orders are made only in exceptional cases.

Care and control

Who takes care of the child on a daily basis, meaning the parent the child lives with. The Family Orders Guide also has wording for shared care and control, with set days and times at each parent's home.

Access

How often the parent without care and control sees the child. The Family Orders Guide has wording for liberal, reasonable, weekly and supervised access.

Maintenance

Financial support for a child. Common orders include fixed monthly payments, repayment of specific expenses, and direct payment to a provider such as a childcare centre. A parent has a duty to maintain their children, and an order under Part 8 of the Women's Charter ends when the child turns 21 unless it says it continues.

Where cases are heard

The Family Courts, part of the Family Justice Courts, hear divorce applications. Children's care arrangements and maintenance are dealt with there as ancillary matters. In orders on custody, care and control and access, the paramount consideration is the welfare of the child.

Parents who are not divorcing can still go to court. A parent may apply under section 5 of the Guardianship of Infants Act for orders on custody, care and control, access and maintenance.

Couples married under Syariah law file for divorce in the Syariah Court, which can make orders on ancillary matters about children and on maintenance under the Administration of Muslim Law Act. A parent in a Muslim marriage can also apply in the Family Courts for a child's maintenance under the Women's Charter, and a breach of certain Syariah Court orders, including on custody and access, can be taken up through the Family Justice Courts.

If you have a child under 21, expect the Mandatory Co-Parenting Programme. The courts' guide says the certificate of completion is filed with the application for divorce, and their chart shows that in a non-simplified case a respondent needs one only if filing a cross-application.

Mediation and help before court

Parents going through divorce with at least one child aged 21 and below are required to attend mediation and counselling at the Family Dispute Resolution Division. A court-appointed mediator and a Court Family Specialist help with disagreements such as children's living arrangements and maintenance. In other cases, parties can ask for mediation or the court can direct it.

Sessions within the Family Justice Courts are non-chargeable. They are also confidential: if the case goes to a hearing, anything said and any document given during mediation and counselling cannot be used as evidence, and the hearing judge will not be the judge who mediated.

In a maintenance case, you may be directed to mediation after you file. For repeat enforcement applications, the court may refer parties to conciliation with a maintenance enforcement officer.

Keeping your own record

Your record is for you first, whether or not you ever go to court. Note the date, time and place of handovers and access visits, what was agreed and what changed, and each child expense with its receipt. Stick to what you saw and heard.

Singapore has a specific reason to note details as they happen. A parent can now apply to enforce a child access order for breaches on or after 2 January 2025. The supporting affidavit must give the specific date, time and location of each alleged breach, and say whether you tried to resolve it. For each breach you must choose this route or contempt proceedings, not both.

For money, keep what shows the payment. To enforce a maintenance order, the courts ask for a calculation of the unpaid amount, bank statements of the account designated for payment and, where an order covers reimbursement, evidence of the expenses. The court treats access and maintenance separately, so unpaid maintenance is not a reason to withhold access.

No app decides how much weight a court gives a record. As a general guide, it helps to write things down close to when they happened, to keep the whole picture and not only the difficult days, and to keep anything independent that supports it. If you are thinking of recording calls or conversations, get local legal advice first.

Step by step: keeping a journal you will actually maintain | tracking shared expenses

What has changed recently

The Family Justice Rules 2024 came into operation on 15 October 2024 and replace the 2014 rules for new filings. Filings made before that date stay under the old rules.

The child access enforcement process above applies to breaches on or after 2 January 2025.

The courts' pages now list mutual agreement among the facts for showing that a marriage has irretrievably broken down, and their chart shows that the co-parenting certificate has also applied to fully simplified cases since 1 July 2024.

Official resources

• Divorce, Singapore Courts
• Guardianship, Singapore Courts
• File a maintenance application, Singapore Courts
• Mediation and counselling in the Family Justice Courts
• File an application to enforce a child access order
• Family Orders Guide (PDF), Family Justice Courts
• Women's Charter 1961, Singapore Statutes Online
• Guardianship of Infants Act 1934, Singapore Statutes Online

Frequently asked questions